1. Phred's breath stinks like the dickens. If not his breath, then just Phred. Like corn chips or dirty socks.
2. Phred is a much better behaved dog than Otis. Always has been, always will be. (Always has been an area of contention for Mark and me, always will be.)
3. If Phred could eat one thing from the wild, it would be goslings (or maybe a half rotted muskrat, but we try to prevent him from eating them. Yuck.).
4. Phred can perform an incredible variety of parlor tricks. We get a big hoot out of "Bang" where he drops to the ground and plays dead. He even twitches. The runner up would be when he balances a treat on his nose, then catches it in his mouth on command.
5. Phred is a dick. Always has been, always will be.
6. Phred hates riding in the car. His stomach gets woozy. Always has, always will.
7. Phred is not a dynamic character.
8. Phred loves his Phred Bed. In fact, he will prance up and down the stairs until we release the baby gate so he can hide away in his bed.
9. Phred can play fetch for hours and not get bored (so long as he has a willing human to toss the ball/stick/rock).
10. Phred is still a dick.
11. Deep down, Phred would love to bite a human. And then shake it like a kitty.
12. Phred loves to carry stuffed animals around in his mouth. Or any other object that is near by. He doesn't chew it, like his brother Otis, he just carries it around while wagging his tail.
13. Phred is motivated by food. As if.
14. Phred has a black patch of fur (like a beauty mark) on his left shoulder. We tried to claim him as defective with the breeder, but because he is a dick, she wouldn't take him back.
15. Still a dick. We just checked.
16. Phred's alter ego is a goat.
17. Phred makes disgusting slurping noises when he sleeps.
18. We love to snuggle with Phred (when he doesn't stink). He's soft and mushy and warm and fuzzy.
19. Phred has the softest ears in the world. I especially like them when they are cold.
20. Once, when Phred was about two years old, I entered him in an agility contest. During the second run of the course, Phred jumped ON TOP of the tunnel, not THROUGH the tunnel. The entire audience laughed. It was embarassing.
21. 20 should have been, "Phred is a dick," but the agility story is a case in point.
22. Phred looks all nice and friendly on the outside, but he has a super vicious mean streak. I am glad he is part of my pack.
23. Phred's theme song is Low Rider.
24. Phred wanted to name Luca, the cat, "Lunch."
25. Phred was named after Fredo Corleone from the Godfather. Both dicks.
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